What would you do with more time?
In the early 70’s, I wanted nothing more than to be Laurie Partridge (aka Susan Dey.) She was everything: beautiful, talented (she sang! she played keyboards!) and oh so cool. As the oldest sibling in our tribute band, I imagined myself Laurie Partridge, taking centre stage, playing keyboards in a groovy poncho. Alas, life as a pop star was not in my future.
The truth is that I loved the idea of being a musician; I just didn’t love the idea of studying the piano. I wasn’t in love with practicing or learning to read music. I was not willing to put in the time to learn because I just didn’t value being a musician enough. So many other things were actually more important to me and I spent my time there.
One of the things I commonly hear during coaching sessions is how difficult it is to find time for the things we say we want to do. Take Patricia, for example. She has been struggling to find enough time for exercise. Work and family place many demands on Patricia but when she looked more closely at how she was spending her time it was clear that time was not the real issue.
As a person with a strong Pleaser saboteur, Patricia would routinely abandon her exercise time for friends’ or family demands. She would even pre-empt her plans if she anticipated someone needed help. By focusing in on the underlying issue of wanting to please others, Patricia saw that she had a belief that she was not “allowed” to put her own needs first and that to do so might mean losing their love and affection.
Once this mistaken belief was brought to the surface, Patricia was able to retire it in favour of keeping her fitness commitments. She is motivated to keep fit knowing that exercise adds to her happiness and supports her value of being helpful to friends and family. It is easier to find the time when what we want to do connects to our values.
What do you long to do if you had more time? What gets in the way of your desires and dreams?
Coaching is an effective way to explore your values and what is preventing you from living the life you dream of. Schedule some time with me and we can explore how coaching can work for you.